Oh How Tv Shows Make Us Feel Shit..

Hello there earthlings,I use the term loosely..
Well today I woke up to the sound of my brother hammering out the tiles in the bathroom.What a pleasant thing to hear at 10 in the morning.. So I went downstairs,desperate for somewhere to go where I wouldn't hear the wretched noise.So the sitting room seemed like quite a good place to me.

If only I knew that it would soon depress the shit outta me ><

I was watching Maury,desperate to have a glimpse at the lives of someone more unfortunate than me. But of course,it had to be one of the happier shows,you know the ones where they make people's lives better? Yes my dears,I hate those ones too.

So there was this one woman who was to be reunited with a man she was once in love with when she was 16.She was 36 now may I add.Anyway,she gained contact with him again through the wonder that is the internet.And it turned out that this man,whom she hadn't spoken to in 20 years felt the exact way she felt for him and when he came on the show he declared his love for her,proposed and yada yada you get the rest.

Why did this make me feel shit,I hear you ask.Well it's just the fact that..you know,I wish someone would care for me as much as those two cared for each other.They hadn't seen each other in 20 years and still their love for each other stood the test of time.How I wish something like that would happen to me..*insert dramatic pose here* Oh don't worry,I know that I'm only 14 (15 nearly may I add,as if that makes much of a difference) and that I have PLENTY of time to look for love,but it still got to me.Recently Keevs' love life hasn't been the best,and she's taking a break from it for awhile (unless of course someone just TOO amazing comes along..).And I know it sounds so sappy,and is such an idiotic thing to get remotely upset about but..it's times like these where seeing other people happy makes me..unhappy.

Oh how melancholy has this post become, "I hate seeing other people happy".

But it's not the fact that I'm not happy,I actually am.I have great friends..well,at the moment anyway.I love my family and you know,life is good at the moment.But there have been a few things during the last month or so that have knocked me down,and I'm still picking up the pieces.

Ah sure,things will be back to normal soon enough,as they always are.Keevs always has her ways of sorting things out..This time should be no different.

I Love You All
Especially You ;)
Toodles xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

OMFG I GOT NEW FRIENDS! I'm NOT Obsessed =P xx

Hey everyone yeh I'm never really go on this anymore but meh I feel like going on it today so..um..I am =]

Yeh recently I made some new friends, Nicky and Danny and I fucking love them! Yeh okay maybe I met them off the internet, but to be honest I've learned that that's where the best friends I have have come from =P So yeh I've met up with them a couple of times and they are such awesome guys and I fucking love them.

And Danny,I know I'm not supposed to mention this cos it makes us come close to tears whenever we talk about it,but he might have to move back to Singapore at the end of the year,depending on his exam results. If he leaves I will actually cry my heart out..as sad and emo as that sounds,but even though I've known him only a few weeks now he is a really good friend of mine and he means so much to me and I'd hate to see him leave.. Ughh I'm gonna stop talking about it now before I cry.

We're going to think happy thoughts from now on and pretend that he's not going anywhere,but just in case he does we're going to make the most of this summer and make sure that it's the best one that he ever has =] We love you Danny!

Hmm..what else..eh yeh I'm just gonna say boy troubles. Not gonna explain anything just going to say I am suffering from a heavy case of confusion right now.. 

My puppy has gotten bigger! I'd send you like a photo or something but guys,you know how retarded and shitty with technology I am..so..eh..maybe another time when my more intellectual friends are online and I can ask them how to do it =P

MISSA AND CHRIS ARE GOING OUT! They are actually soooooooooooo cute together it's unreal =) 

And at the moment I'm listening to Wan singing..he's actually really good =] But yeh I have no idea what he's doing right now and I'm kinda scared lol!!!!!

Okayys well eh I have no idea what the hell I'm typing,I'm just seeing how much I can type without having to stop and think and this is all I can get out so like yeh I'm gonna go now..... LoveYouAllSoFuckingMuchToodles!

And Missa you're the exception..ask me later ;) xxxxxxxxxxx

Sorry For Yeh,Nothing! =S

Apologies for the lack of posts recently,I've just forgotten to update this and I'm also a tad bit busy,it being the holidays and all. I've just been out with friends most days,in town and stuffs like.This summer has been pretty fun so far, apart from several unnecessary fights had with my friends,but I seriously couldn't be arsed going into the details :(

I also made up with one of my friends who I haven't talked to in months,and I'm glad we're friends again :)

I've started going out with this guy that I'm really happy with

And right now,I'm in my grandparents house as I'm going to work in the playschool out their backgarden til Thursday,to try and get SOME money XD


I also got a puppy the other day! It's a shih-tzu called Roxy(I didn't want to call it that though:( ). She was such a surprise though,cos I had no idea that we were getting a dog! XD

I love her soooo much though,she's like the cutest thing ever and she's only like 6 weeks old! O.O

Anywayys yeh,I'm soooo knackered so I'll update later cos there's some more shit that I need to talk about

LoveYouAll,EspeciallyYou;) xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Toodles xx

I'm Such A Sap!

Oh my God, I'm such a sap. I read the last blog that I wrote, where I was really sad and was talking about how my friends helped me through tough times, and I started crying! God, I'm so sad haha. I'm not saying that what I said in the blog wasn't true, I'm just saying like.. I cried? haha

Me and Dyllie have finally gotten over our shyness! I've known him since like January and we could never talk in person because we were both so shy but now, finally, we're able to talk! Yay!! XD

I'm supposed to be going to Liffey Valley on Saturday with my friend Kate. I've known her for like 2 years and she lives relatively close to me but I've NEVER seen her! haha, don't worry though folks, she IS real =P So yeh, should be awesome =)

I'm making a chocolate biscuit cake in home-ec tomorrow! Gonna be so yummy!

And FINALLY I understand my maths! Well, the bit that we're on now anyways lol. I'm in honours btw, it's mad hard and I'm only in second year like so it's gonna get WAYY harder!

I untuned my guitar by accident.. and I dunno how to tune it back so I'm screwed! haha, my grandad says he's gonna try and get my a Fender. I can't play all too good, but he offered to get me one for free, I was hardly going to say no, was I? lawl

So yeh, you've all probably noticed that I'm far more happier than I was in the last post, and you'd be right! I'm going to make the most of it too XD

On a more serious note.. a lot of people in Kildare have been committing suicide lately.

First it was some girl in Maynooth, then it was a girl who used to be in my friend Jemma's class in primary and next was a girl who was in 6th class in Laura and Merissa's primary school.

And someone told me that they all knew each other, which I find really strange, seeing as they all killed themselves within weeks, even days of each other. Now, I'm not 100% sure that they all knew each other, but many people have been saying that have. So, is there like some conspiracy going on? I'm not joking when I say that, making fun of the situation, I'm actually wondering. Maybe not as much if they didn't know each other, but if they did.. maybe something's going on?

Anywayys I gotta run, my friend is trying to get me to tell him my bra size but I won't lawl. Random? Yes
True? Unfortunately..

I'm not gonna tell him though lol

Toodle!!

<3>

Can't Take It Anymore

Seriously, I don't know why this bullshit keeps happening to me. I don't get why it all just can't stop. It's been going on for fucking 14 years and then finally, I thought everything was okay. But after this shitty week, I now think different.

I sound like a certain someone I used to know, complaining about my life, saying how shitty it is. But everyone, I would just love to tell you what exactly is wrong, but I can't. Not because I can't explain it, or that I don't know what's wrong, it's simply the fact that I don't WANT to tell you all, because I don't think it's your business.

But I have got a reason to complain and moan and kick and scream and cry. Some of you know why, some of you don't and that's the way it's going to stay. Usually by now I would say "Seriously, I can't take it anymore", but I'm going to do what I have done for the last 14 years.

Ignore it all.

Why care about it? Why keep stressing over it? It's not me doing the damage, and I'll get out of this okay, we all will. Well, most of us will.

Everything will be back to normal soon, then it's going to happen again, then it'll go back to normal again.. and so on, so fucking forth.

But I can deal with it. It's weird, this blog seems to get more optimistic the more I write. The main thing that really helps me get through these shitty times are my family obviously, and especially my friends.

I want to give a shout out to the ones who were there when I needed them.

Merissa, Jemma, Laura, Fiona, Aishling, Chris, Dylan and Shane.

You were all there for me when I needed you the most, even though some of you don't even realise it.

Even simple things like making me laugh helps guys! And I love you for that, for putting up with my bullshit, for continuing to talk to me on those rare occasions when I let you know I was depressed, and even the times when I didn't let you know.

I love you all, and I want you to know that.

No matter what happens between us all, you will all have a place in my heart.

Gay..but true :)

<3>

Meh and Yeh.. and Meh, I Dunno

Yeh, for the past week I've been getting upset randomly and I have no idea why. People keep telling me it's hormones but I think it's more than that.

I shouldn't have been too mad in the playground, all my bones hurt now and it sucks lawl, I'm too old (even though I'm only 14 haha ).

I got off school early on Tueday cos I was sick (I was more upset than sick, but let's just say I was sick).

And today (Thursday) I didn't go to school cos I was sick too.

My mam thinks I'm being bullied lawl, but I'm actually not!

She also thinks that I should go to a counsellor and tbh, I'm considering it.

Youth club tomorrow! Woohoo!

I get to see all my awesome friends!

And I'm probably going to town this weekend too, which should also be awesome :P

nothing more to say.. oh btw, I'm trying to play guitar again (not going too good haha)

Toodles!

<3>

I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU

I hate him so much, I hate him so much, I hate him so much I fucking hate him so much!!

Anyway, moving on, today I went to the playground with Sabrina, Chris, Laura, Josh, Jemma, Fiona, Missa and Ducky. I was like mad hyper and we were scaring all the little kids lawl! I've never been so damn hyper in my life, and I felt like a little kid XD

Then later we met up with Glen, Ali, Cliff and G. I had a pretty awesome day but then some confusing shit happened with someone who was kinda stood up by someone else..but meh lawl

We actually tried calling for Buttons but his mammy said that he was sick =(

Oh yeh, and the only thing I've eaten today was like 3 chip sticks and a quarter of an Easter egg lawl! :P Is that healthy? Meh, I don't care x

Also, Chris has scared the shit outta me. He told me that if I keep drinking energy drinks I'm gonna die.. I've been drinking like one everyday for the past 3 months, not too healthy I'm guessing? haha

School tomorrow! :( KILL ME :'(

Meh, nothing else to say..tee tee y elle..

I FUCKING HATE HIM

=]
Toodles

<3>

LAURA'S BACK FROM THE LAND OF OBAMA!! YAY!!!!!!! =)

Just thought I'd express my feelings on her return lawl x

Today we all just watched Role Models in Fiona's house, was pretty awesome, the nerdy guy from SuperBad was in it, AND Jorma from The Lonely Island!! You should have heard us all scream when he came on haha =) Oh, and Missa, Ash and me all recorded a vid of us singing the AwesomeTown song, I was Akiva for OBVIOUS reason haha!

Me and Missa decided that we're going to make our own world called Humpia, and we will be called Humpians XD

Peeps who were at Fifi's house were... (let me see if I can remember them all lawl)
Fiona, Me, Laura, Aishling, Merissa, Aoife, Chris, Glenn, Shane, Ali, G, Cliff and Keith? I think that was it lawl :P

So yeh, we had a pretty good day, Missa made me go out in the freezing rain to meet up with Shane without a jacket or an umbrella!! I wouldn't be surprised if I get pneumonia lawl!! :S

And I made up with a friend today, who I thought I had lost. Not gonna mention their name but I'm just glad that most shit has been sorted out =]

School next week!!! Grrrr!!!! Please shoot me =[

My heart keeps hurting, and not in the pathetic emo poetic way (that sounded cool!! =O ) but like there's something wrong with it.. I'm kinda scared :S

And for some reason lately I've been feeling down for no apparent reason and it's really messed up, I don't wanna be sad! I wanna be happy like everyone else!! =(

Nothing else really happened today..tomorrow I'm probs just hanging out with friends and shizz again :P

Oh and btw, please check out Kitty's (my friend Kate's) blog on bebo. She has awesome taste in music and this blog should give you an insight to all the deadly new and upcoming bands XD

http://www.bebo.com/BlogView.jsp?MemberId=123165047&BlogId=9070031744

Lies Lies, I Know They Are, Don't Lie

So, more shit happened today. I was on msn, talking to my friends when Sabrina starts talking to me. Innocently enough I talk back, it's only Sabrina,what harm could it do?

Well, when it turned out that it wasn't actually Sabrina, but Lucy, Dave and their 2 other "friends", shit happened.

I just told them to fuck off and not waste my time. You could understand where I was coming from, right? They were obviously looking for a fight, that's what simple people like them do. They have nothing better to do with their sad, sad lives.

They started the taunting and I wasn't going to write back, I was going to be the bigger person. But then I thought to myself, I can turn this shit around. I CAN show them who's the bigger person..but i'll do it in another way. Let's just say my replies to their taunts made them look like fools (and by the way? their taunts were pretty shit anyway haha)

They started off saying I was gay. Oh! Burn! As if I gave 2 shits. That's why I've had several boyfriends, one of them lasting 5, nearly 6 months, and Lucy has had none? (i'm not going to even consider counting her pathetic relationships with Jonny and Glenn). Yes, because I'M gay. Then they said, well your boyfriend didn't like you anyway. Yes guys, that's why he pleaded with me not to break up with him, cos he hated me (i'm only trying to prove a point, not trying to sound big-headed and saying that i'm better than he was or anything).

Then they called me ugly. I never said I was pretty so I REALLY didn't give a fuck.

Then they told me that I was jealous of Buttons (my ex) and Niamh. Yes, jealous of the guy who I barely wanted to go out with in the first place? Sure, why not. My comeback was something along the lines of.. How can I be the one obsessed with Buttons? Surely you all know about how Lucy became depressed when he went out with Aoife, and how she wrote blogs about how much she loved him? Yes, because I'M obsessed with him (btw that's true about Lucy and Buttons lawl, poor Buttons =[ )

Then they said some stupid shit about how my mam was good in bed. OH!!!! What a frickin' good insult haha

Then they started going on about how Lucy could get more boyfriends than me. I told them that I didn't mean to sound big-headed, but I knew MANY a guy that fancy me, and any guy I ask don't fancy Lucy cos they say she's a heartless, self absorbed bitch that wears too much make up..hmm..

Then I said if they didn't believe me, they could ask Dave, because that's what Dave told me once when I asked him if he fancied Lucy. Then? They signed out!

Best thing was? Dave was there, probably feeling soooo embarrassed. I'd have loved to be there, to have been able to experience the damn hostility.

And if they don't believe that Dave said that? They can ask my friends who were there when he said it on msn at my friend Aishling's sleepover, I'm sure it's saved on her computer somewhere..

Oh yeh, and one of the main reasons why guys usually avoid Lucy when it come to going out with her, is because of the way she "let's them down".

Examples:

She told Ruairi, this guy from youth club who is extremely sensitive, that she was a lesbian (when she knew and was clearly not one). She left him crying, myself and some other friends had to help him realise taht she wasn't worth it.

Then she told a guy called Matthew, who, I add, is slightly rotund, that she wouldn't go out with him because "she couldn't see past the fat flabs". Matthew is only 12/13 and I doubt being told THAT made his life any damn easier. And she thought she was funny when she said that but no one else fucking thought so.

Those are SOME of the examples of why guys don't really like Lucy in that way, so I wasn't being mean I was just being honest. She thinks she's too good for all of them, but I'm pretty damn sure that Dave will soon be an exception.

Well I'm guessing you all know now that I'm not Dave's friend either? lawl, I wasn't planning on not being his friend cos I thought he was a nice guy, but after we told him that we weren't going to be friends with Lucy he launched into a massive rant about how we had no right to and shit. He hasn't even known Lucy for a fucking MONTH, who the hell is he to judge? It's not as if we even told him to stop being friends with her! Oh yeh, and THAT fight? It was with my friend Merissa, a twelve year old. He's nearly 17, and he picked a fight with a 12 year old? Then he totally contradicted himself yesterday. On msn he was going on about how immature Merissa was and then he texted me, telling me he thought she was too mature for her age and that she should act like a kid. Wtf? Make up your mind dude! HE'S the fucking immature one!

Oh and Lucy, regarding your blog, that weird, sick feeling you get in the pit of your stomach? It's call regret. Regret for what you have become, or more like have always been, regret for all the friends you lost, and regret for having numerous chances and not using them to the most of their ability.

Regret

Ahhhh, such a sweet sweet feeling, when it's not you experiencing it

Toodles xoxoxo

Shit Happens I Guess x

Well.. as you all may have heard, I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 months last week. Was a pretty messed up story though. I broke up with him last Monday, then I got back with him on the Thursday, then I broke up with him again the following day. You may all think I'm just a whore who has a constant changing mind..and you may be right, but I had my reasons for breaking up with him yet again, and I believe that going out with him the second time WAS a mistake :(

I would like to say that the break up was mutual, I really would but that would be a blatant lie. It WAS pretty messy, I must admit.. but I hope we can still be friends, even though everytime we talk we seem to get into fights..

I also started going out with Dave. Now I KNOW what you're all thinking "Oh god Keeva, do you have any regards towards Scott's feelings? That you would go and flaunt someone else in front him so soon?" Well that's NOT the case. Scott actually told Dave on several occasions that he could go out with me. I didn't NEED Scott's permission, but it was good to know that he was okay with it.

So.. Missa and Jonny are going out, and they are the most cutest thing ever! They are inseperable whenever they are together, but Missa doesn't get to see him as much as she'd like to as his parents are an ickle bit strict :S

And Keith and Fiona are also going out. They actually cannnot keep their hands off each other, it's kinda scary.. lawl, but they are soooo cute together xD

And I'm going to Paris with my school next Sunday for 4 days!! This will actually only be my second time abroad so it's gonna be uber-awesome!! Aishling + Niamh = Best Roomies Ever!!

School is gay as usual.. but I FINALLY figured out how to use the sewing machine!! I am actually so fucking proud of myself seeing as last year I had NO idea how to use it and got my mam to do practically all of my home-ec project lawl xD

I'm going to see Metallica in August.. I don't exactly know WHY seeing as I don't like them all that much but meh, it's something to do I guess :P

And..I think that's all I gotta say

So I shall tee tee y elle

SHIT!
I just spilled my glass of lemonade over!!
GRRR!!!!!!!!!! =[

Anyways... toodles!! xoxoxoxo