To Merissa- I don't know why we're doing this through blogs,but ah well, here we go.

Duno why I didn't use your name in the blogs,it's not really a question that infuriates me anyways so yeh :L I know that you couldn't list off ALL the shit that I wrote in my blog,obviously. But the main reason why I don't think we'll ever be the same ever again is cos even though you weren't planning on doing it,the fucking THOUGHT of "deflating my ego" went through your head? Even THINKING about doing that pisses me off.That basically means that you wanted to bully me,until I thought myself worthless. And you thought I was "leader of the group"?That I thought I was better than everyone else? I'm not the one who gave myself that title,and I'm sorry if I get on with people? Is that such a fucking crime?


And dude stop saying "if I died tomorrow you wouldn't care".That's such a childish,heartless thing to say.Of course I'd fucking care. Just shows how much you think of me I guess.Even if we're not as close I'd still care,obviously.I do have a heart,in case you haven't noticed.

And I'm not saying I'm innocent in all of this shenanigans,but you and everyone else constantly bitched about me,and little by little you's all grew more distant.And you's thought that you could give me shit and offer me a "second chance",but why would I agree to it when I don't think I need one? If we both have done the same shit why am I the one who needs a second chance :L
I've grown up from the whole "let's target someone and mess with their heads and then maybe not be their friends" shite.That's soooooooooooo March like lmao :L

And the thing I'm just uber pissed about is the fact that everyone calls me two faced,even though they're equally in the wrong? I said shit to people about other people (and the shit wasn't even that bad?) hoping that I could trust them not to tell the shit to the people it was about (you did this as well Merissa) but nooooooooo you's had to say EVERYTHING I said.Then make it out that I was two faced? Aren't you's all two faced aswell,seeing as I trusted you's with that shit?

And yes Merissa I know I'm a bitch too for telling your secret yada yada. I did not say it out of spite,I forget how it even came up really.But it was told and the person I told it to promised she wouldn't say it back to you.And I believed I could trust the fucking whore :L So I didn't tell your secret out of spite,but it was told.And when you found out you should have just told me you knew,and asked me why I told and stuff and I would have admitted I was in the wrong.But you said it after that whole fucking commotion with Lucy,which was seriously not the best time as after all the shit she said to me I believed everyone hated me.

All this shit just heated up and became a bigger deal than it ever had to be.You shouldn't have kept it inside,you should have just told me what I did wrong and more than likely shit would have been okayy.

But nah,like in usual girl fashion,a scene had to be made =]

(and yes I know I use the word shit a lot xD )
xxxxxxxxxxxx

Yoo.

Today was a pretty fun day.Hung out in Lewis' with him Ste and Lewis' lil bro while Macker was at band practice with the others.Was paranoid about shite but it was actually pretty fun =]

Then we went out for a bit and then when Macker came back from Dave's a few of us went up to Louis' house and watched Brooke Knows Best,cos we're TOO awesome for words betches XD And then we realised it was the perfect opportunity to take band pics for Zero Tolerance cos ALL the members were there so I was photographer for the day and we took some pretty retarded pics,in Louis' bath and his mam's bed and shite.Just hope his mam doesn't notice the smell of boy in her bed or she'll be wondering what Louis was up to =S lmao!

Then we went Ste's cos he had a free gaff and we danced and shite for awhile and got scared shitless out his scary garden XD And then we had a major orgy in his bro's room with his permantly erect dog Jake =]

All in all it was a good day but then I kinda wrecked it at the end,sorry =[ I was in a weird mood but I love you.

And,going out to YOU again.I was just really disappointed that you didn't stick up for me,and some of the points I made in my last post you didn't mention to me.Some you did,yes,like ending the war,but the points about not applying the same rules to me as your friend and shit,you didn't mention that.I'm not going to continue this shit but you just gotta realise that I probably won't act the same around you as before,and I wouldn't hold it against you if you did the same.

Love ya'll
Keeva xxxxxxxx

The Truth Lies In The Blog Name Baby

I really truly despise blogs nowadays.Everyone writes shit in them that they'd never say to your face,and then their excuse is that you "don't have to read it if you don't want to?". What a stupid feckin excuse.Like,just cos I don't read it doesn't mean it's not there?

And this goes out to you,and you know it's to you when you read it,just let me have MY say.

Okay,so you say people don't bitch about their friends,yada yada but that's a lie and you know it is.Friends bitch about each other,not maliciously but at the end of the day it still happens.It could be pointing out a flaw of theirs etc. but it's just general girl-ism or whatever the feck you want to call it.Big deals don't have to be caused by it,but of course you couldn't let that happen.I'm not trying to be a bitch,I'm just explaining my point of view.If I told a secret of yours,why couldn't you just point that out to me? Instead of telling me in the middle of this mess I'm having with her? You've bitched about me,I know you have and if you have I don't care.It's human nature.And you can't blame me for believing what other people said,when everyone else has said that you've said it.Whenever I used to ask you if you said shit about you,you went on a rant,saying that I shouldn't ever think you'd say that cos your my "best friend".

So why doesn't the same rule apply to me? When I denied that stuff,why didn't you believe me? Why are the rules different? I can admit when I'm wrong,but you should too.This is just me having my say.And of course I won't talk to you outside when I'm pissed with you?

You said in earlier blogs that we apologised to each other,when the hell did we ever do that? We never did? We talked but we never made up? I'm glad we had a proper talk about it the other day though,and yes I was disappointed that you didn't stick up for me.

We've both experienced the same shit in our lives,surely that wouldn't have made you stick uo for me even more? Cos you know how much it hurts? As a "best friend" that was the least I expected from you,to stick up for me? And no,you're not the only person I'm targeting cos I've said it to everyone and I've apologised for anything I've said to anyone.

But what you's BASICALLY did was take every single "bad" comment I said in the past few months and even when I trusted all of you,you's went off and told the people that they were about,to? You call me two-faced,but all of you are.We're all in the same boat here.

We're girls
We bitch
It's life.
And yes we bitch about our friends too,but what else have we got to do in our spare time? And that goes out to EVERYONE.
We all do it
Get over it,how old are we all now?

And I blocked you for like a day and then my internet stopped working :L

So just get over this.This is NOT a bitchy blog,so don't take it up that way

Keeva x

I'm dancing in the moonlight                               It's caught me in its spotlight..

Heyy everyone.I'm in a Thin Lizzy mood right now,they're making me happy so I'm just gonna keep listening to them.Cos being happy is awesome,fuck anyone who says that it's "over-rated".Being happy..it's an deadly feeling for obvious reasons.And anyone who says that it's not that great a thing obviously have never truly experienced the feeling.When you are deriously happy,and nothing anyone says can bring you down..well that's a glorious feeling and how dare anyone say it's not.

Right now,yeh I'm happy, and I can admit that.I'm not afraid to.I'm not going to go around pretending that everything's going to shit,when it's not.Yeh life isn't perfect right now but at this moment in time I'm aigh't.I could be happier,but you can always be happier.I'm pretty content with how I'm feeling right now.

Yeh tomorrow's a different day,and maybe everything will change and I'll turn into a depressed wreck but why think about tomorrow?

I've learned to make the most of what I got and not to worry about stupid fickle things.Okay yeh..I say that and I DO still worry and complain about random shit,but I'm trying my best.I'm not perfect,I'm sure you all know that by now but I'm just going to try and make the best of any situation I'm in and deal with shit if or when it's thrown at me.

And all of this came from listening to Thin Lizzy..It's amazing how music can make you feel.

R.I.P. Phil xx

Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak
Somewhere in this town..

Minds Can Change Easily..But In This Case,Let's Hope Not =S

I'm in the business of misery,Let's take it from the top.
She's got a body like an hourglass that's ticking like a clock.
It's a matter of time before we all run out,
When I thought he was mine she caught him by the mouth.
I waited eight long months,She finally set him free.
I told him I couldn't lie he was the only one for me.
Two weeks and we had caught on fire,
She's got it out for me,But I wear the biggest smile.

Whoa, I never meant to brag
But, I got him where I want him now.
Whoa, it was never my intention to brag
To steal it all away from you now.
But god does it feel so good,Cause I got him where I want him now.
And if you could then you know you would.
Cause god it just feels so...It just feels so good.

Second chances they don't ever matter, people never change.
Once a whore you're nothing more, I'm sorry, that'll never change.
And about forgiveness, we're both supposed to have exchanged.
I'm sorry honey, but I'm passing up, now look this way.
Well there's a million other girls who do it just like you.
Looking as innocent as possible to get to who,
They want and what they like it's easy if you do it right.
Well I refuse, I refuse, I refuse!

I watched his wildest dreams come true
Not one of them involving you
Just watch my wildest dreams come true
Not one of them involving...

Thanks Lucy,for bringing that song to my attention haha. Luv yhuu xx

I Salute You

Neil Diamond,oh how do you make me so happy?

Fuck This,Fuck EVERYTHING

Everything I fucking do is always thrown back in my face.

When I try and help nothing good comes of it.

Nobody would fucking notice if I weren't here.

Do ask me please,why the FUCK do I even bother?

What's the point,what IS the fucking point? What good am I getting from this?

Nothing ever goes right, as self centred as that sounds.

So? I give up. I don't give a shit anymore.

Don't call for me cos I'm not fucking home.